Deuw-Yore eSearch is a customisable internet search engine, frequented primarily by professional sociologists, academics, client experience enhancement consultants, clinical beauticians and other truth-seekers.
Kon Spiro Cetheris, supported by leading truth-in-reporting advocates Al X. Jonz, Dave Id-Icky & David Avocado Turnip, developed Deuw-Yore to fill the gap left by the Illuminati take-over of Google and Bing. The company has since become a favourite in scientific rationalist circles for its unbiased, dispassionate, measured analysis of cutting-edge theoretical controversies in various academic disciplines, and of trending internet tropes.
It has become one of the world’s leading search engines in recent years, after revelations of its popularity in both the White House and the Fox News research department.
Whereas Google’s user demographic skewed towards the YUPPIE—Young Upwardly-mobile Professionals Pursuing Innercity real Estate—Deuw-Yore is more popular with CLOUWNS—College-deprived Overeating Upwardly-Wakey Non-Sheeple.
Users tend to be committed proselytisers, dedicated to carrying the message even to the bowels of Youtube comments sections, where they can be identified by their anarchic abandon in the matters of grammar, caps lock usage, and ideological coherence, and their anti-mating calls:
“Wake up, Sheeple!”
This commitment to proselytising for increased usage of this particular engine is remarkable. It is not known what percentage of users are actual shareholders of the Deuw-Yore eSearch PiTY Ltd, but anecdotal evidence suggests that many actually volunteer their time, which they appear to have a great deal of. It has been suggested that they are perhaps rewarded simply by the warm inner glow of setting right a net denizen on the verge of intellectual error. It has not been believed, but it has been suggested.
There are marked correlations between Deuw-Yore eSearch advocates, Moon Hoaxers, Flat Earthers, Birthers, and Mandela Effect enthusiasts, possibly due to the high standards of truth, proof, and grammar also required by those sub-demographics. Or possibly not. More data points should clarify.
They drive mostly flat-bed pick-up trucks and big ol’ John Deere skidders, are fond of movies starring Steven Siegal, Bruce Willis or The Rock, and their favourite flavour is purple. They vote conservative if they are not too drunk that day, Sovereign Citizen X if they are.
Dogs don’t like them.
NEXT: An informative breakdown of the online shopping habits of people who believe both that crisis actors are mostly illegal refugees and that the Titanic was an inside job.
Based on extensive data* collected with absolute ethical fanaticism and never, ever, passed on without permission except when paid. We here at Quaerentem pride ourselves on our commitment to the loftiest standards, and as we speak, FB is running their flag the highest though that may change. Hi Alphabet. Contact details above. 🙂
[*cheers, Zuke, cheque’s in the mail]